If you are a follower of this blog, or my tumblr, or happen to be someone I know, you may have noticed that I have receded from outside interaction for the holidays and new year. No real reason, it is just one of the those things that occur every now and again. I think that it is overall a needed and good thing. In those time of hermitage, I get a lot of time to be with myself and my own mind, in these times I remember myself. It’s not that I forget, but being present in the NOW has historically been difficult for me. I spent much of my youth escaping, at first through books and other peoples stories, and then just as easily into my own mind and stories. At the heart of it all I am very much a dreamer. But I have learned how to have a fulfilling joyful life here in the now of this reality as well. It took a concentrated effort to do at first, and now I find that I easily get caught up in the details of things in the now. The tasks that are right in front of me take so much concentration that the doors to those other realms of reality get firmly shut. When I get some time and space away from other voices, opinions, projects, interactions, I open those doors again and am refreshed with soul lifting spirit of my dreams and the aspirations of my true self once more. Because that’s the point of living to me, always striving.
Maybe none of that made much sense to anyone else, and that’s ok. The crux of it is that I need time with just me and my beloved. I thrive when I get some time to myself to listen to music and walk, or read a novel, or watch movies. They feed me. Particular stories and songs remind me of what I am striving for. They swell my heart and soul with courageous deeds, and impossible odds, that give me the strength to keep on. I am so grateful for those times.
I have to say this hermitage was particularly fruitful. I realized that teenage me would be so fucking impressed with me now. I have achieved much of the levels of coolness that I wanted then. Silly as that may sound it is comforting. What’s more I know that there is more that I want to accomplish.
And in that vein I’ve decided to make a list of things that I would love to do in the year ahead. Just a small reference for me to look back on in 2016 and see where I was. Nothing on this list is set in stone, and I leave room for things to morph and do and accomplish things I cannot even imagine at the present moment instead. But for the now I’m just going to mark some things that would make me happy.
- Become financially stable and more independent better able to provide for my family and household
- Start putting away money for special trips and buying a home
- Get the closet under some form of control
- Replace the TV stand
- Continue to upgrade the little things about the house that make me happy
- Go visit the folks in NC
- Make the Lumberjack’s 30th be something special
- Do more home cooking
- Get drivers licences
- Sew some of the projects I have planned
- Get rid of some of the stash of fabric I have
- Eat healthier
- Join a gym or class of some sort
- Get eyes checked and new glasses
- Go to the dentist
- Continue annotation and comparison of the Tain
- Continue prayer memorization
- Read at least one of the books on my shelf
- Make art
- Coordinate and plan two ritual camping trips
- Hold a blessing of the blades service in honor of the Morrighan
- Write more prayer songs
- Go for more walks with my music
- Continue visiting my sacred places
- Get away with the Lumberjack to the woods and just be
- Continue to be involved in demanding change from our government on all levels
- Try to stretch daily
- Continue with daily practices
- Finish writing one of my fanfics
- Rent a cabin in the woods with my dear friends and be delightfully and terribly witchy
- Do some of the projects of presents for people that I love
- Read one of the comics that the Lumberjack wants me to
- Go someplace new
- Continue to update my wardrobe into what I want
- Have more pampering days that involve oil, and lovely scents, and general wonderful things
- Have both Mom and Dad record or write down a beloved story/memory from their childhood
- Honor the festival days, holy days, household deities, ancestors, Gods and Ungods
- Continue to research and learn more about the Gaelic world view and lifeway
Well that’s all I can think of at the moment…May at least some of these things happen and more that I cannot think of now.
May you all have the time and space to think, reflect, and feed your hearts and souls when you need.